In a desperate attempt to
update, I give you this quiz I wrote a year ago. It was supposed to be there on
my Facebook notes cause as I have realized of late, all the fucked up people
out there just don’t read blogs, do they ? In any case : If you think it's funny, great! If you
don't... well then.. you're probably pregnant and that's just estrogen talking.
1.Do you secretly like to pinch babies?
A.Ooooooh yes! How fun! Pinchy pinchy! Bet it hurts the little bastards!
B.How would YOU like it if you were fluffy and someone tried to puncture you?
C.Goo goo.
D.YEEEES! PINCH THEM! THEY ARE SPAAAARTAAAAAAANS!
2.Given the chance, would you throw a baby on the wall to see if it bounces back?
A.Absolutely. Infact, the older the wall, the worse it’s for the babies’ skin. Besides, normally the baby doesn’t bounce back. It just falls down and starts crying and shit. Hmph! Stupid gravity.
B.Dude. Don’t ever do that. Please. *starts crying*
C.Boo?
D.YES! But whenever we throw the baby on the wall, the wall breaks down! Why?! Because, WE ARE SPAAAARTAAAAAANSSSS!
3.Why did the baby cross the road?
A.Because it was stapled to the chicken! Ha! Here’s a better one! What’s funnier than a dead baby?! Ha? A dead baby in a clown costume. Bwahahahahahahah.
B.Aaaw. Maybe the baby is learning how to walk. But what if it…hits a car?! Or worse, what if it has to poop?! Who will help it with the diapers?! WHO?! *starts crying*. *Again*.
C.Waaaaaaaaaaaah. *poops*
D.Because, the baby MUST do what it should! Or else! TONIGHT, THE BABY DINES IN HELLL! BECAUSE THIS IS SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !
4.Why do you do when a baby pees all over you?
A.I pee all over it too.
B.Aaaaaw. The cute little thing. I change it’s diapers, of course.
C.Hehehehehehe. *insert giggle sound HERE*
D.The baby MUST learn toilet etiquette! Why? Because THIS IS SPARTAAAAA!
5.Babies for President?
A.Are you fuckin insane?! I’d rather have my own pimple as president.
B.Aaaw. That would be SO cute! I can already imagine it fumbling while giving it’s speech! Aaaw.
C.Boo boo, biggle wiggle.
D.Why of course! But first we must train him! We must teach him to do 98 push ups first! Why? BECAUSE…..okay, okay, I’ll stop.
Mostly A’s – Dude! You so hate babies! And babies SO hate you! You’re horrible with babies. You’re probably the guy who started the phenomenon of dead baby jokes! You either had a very bad childhood or you’re incapable of producing a baby yourself! Whatever it is, dude, some of them dead baby jokes are hilarious! Bwahahahahaha.
Mostly B’s – Aaaaw. Look at you. You little baby lover! You’re fantastic with children. The only problem is that you say ‘aaaw’ one time too many. Given the chance, you will pamper the baby until it turns into this anvil-sized blob, no? Frankly, I think you should stop feeding the little idiot so much. And maybe you take time off from making that stupid sweater. I can see you’re pink in the face right now! Aaaw.
Mostly C’s – Dude, you are a baby. Which makes me believe that you are friendly with other babies. If you aren’t friendly, you are one mean little baby. I can already imagine you wearing leather tights, tiny little guns and a sucker in your mouth muttering the words – “This cradle isn’t big enough for the both of us… mothersucker”. Gedit? Mothersucker? Gedit? Haha.
Mostly D’s – Why King Leonidas! We all have heard the barbaric stories of Sparta and it’s ill treatment of children. But I gotta give it to you. You sure do have good taste in babies. All the babies in Sparta grow up to healthy, well built, half naked, good looking men. But surely, the very idea of killing weak babies when they are born sounds weird to you? Why, this is blasphemy! This is madness! No? THISSSS ISSSS SPARTAAAAAAAAAAA!
1.Do you secretly like to pinch babies?
A.Ooooooh yes! How fun! Pinchy pinchy! Bet it hurts the little bastards!
B.How would YOU like it if you were fluffy and someone tried to puncture you?
C.Goo goo.
D.YEEEES! PINCH THEM! THEY ARE SPAAAARTAAAAAAANS!
2.Given the chance, would you throw a baby on the wall to see if it bounces back?
A.Absolutely. Infact, the older the wall, the worse it’s for the babies’ skin. Besides, normally the baby doesn’t bounce back. It just falls down and starts crying and shit. Hmph! Stupid gravity.
B.Dude. Don’t ever do that. Please. *starts crying*
C.Boo?
D.YES! But whenever we throw the baby on the wall, the wall breaks down! Why?! Because, WE ARE SPAAAARTAAAAAANSSSS!
3.Why did the baby cross the road?
A.Because it was stapled to the chicken! Ha! Here’s a better one! What’s funnier than a dead baby?! Ha? A dead baby in a clown costume. Bwahahahahahahah.
B.Aaaw. Maybe the baby is learning how to walk. But what if it…hits a car?! Or worse, what if it has to poop?! Who will help it with the diapers?! WHO?! *starts crying*. *Again*.
C.Waaaaaaaaaaaah. *poops*
D.Because, the baby MUST do what it should! Or else! TONIGHT, THE BABY DINES IN HELLL! BECAUSE THIS IS SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !
4.Why do you do when a baby pees all over you?
A.I pee all over it too.
B.Aaaaaw. The cute little thing. I change it’s diapers, of course.
C.Hehehehehehe. *insert giggle sound HERE*
D.The baby MUST learn toilet etiquette! Why? Because THIS IS SPARTAAAAA!
5.Babies for President?
A.Are you fuckin insane?! I’d rather have my own pimple as president.
B.Aaaw. That would be SO cute! I can already imagine it fumbling while giving it’s speech! Aaaw.
C.Boo boo, biggle wiggle.
D.Why of course! But first we must train him! We must teach him to do 98 push ups first! Why? BECAUSE…..okay, okay, I’ll stop.
Mostly A’s – Dude! You so hate babies! And babies SO hate you! You’re horrible with babies. You’re probably the guy who started the phenomenon of dead baby jokes! You either had a very bad childhood or you’re incapable of producing a baby yourself! Whatever it is, dude, some of them dead baby jokes are hilarious! Bwahahahahaha.
Mostly B’s – Aaaaw. Look at you. You little baby lover! You’re fantastic with children. The only problem is that you say ‘aaaw’ one time too many. Given the chance, you will pamper the baby until it turns into this anvil-sized blob, no? Frankly, I think you should stop feeding the little idiot so much. And maybe you take time off from making that stupid sweater. I can see you’re pink in the face right now! Aaaw.
Mostly C’s – Dude, you are a baby. Which makes me believe that you are friendly with other babies. If you aren’t friendly, you are one mean little baby. I can already imagine you wearing leather tights, tiny little guns and a sucker in your mouth muttering the words – “This cradle isn’t big enough for the both of us… mothersucker”. Gedit? Mothersucker? Gedit? Haha.
Mostly D’s – Why King Leonidas! We all have heard the barbaric stories of Sparta and it’s ill treatment of children. But I gotta give it to you. You sure do have good taste in babies. All the babies in Sparta grow up to healthy, well built, half naked, good looking men. But surely, the very idea of killing weak babies when they are born sounds weird to you? Why, this is blasphemy! This is madness! No? THISSSS ISSSS SPARTAAAAAAAAAAA!
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