One day, my friend and I were having a random conversation* while we headed to Oxford Bookstore in a rickshaw. As we stopped at a red light, several prostitutes jumped on us and started biting our ear. Soon, after much explanation from my end, they realized that just because the signal has a red light doesn't mean that it's a red light area. Much of the aforementioned ear biting stopped.
Ha Ha! I jest. I'm in a very joky mood today.
So yes, we stopped at a signal. As a joke, I told my friend that we too should stop talking until the light turns green. He didn't find the joke to be very funny, but he agreed. Like I said... today, me, joky!
At this point, a Chevy Spark stopped right beside us. Usually, a Chevy Spark isn't something that would grab my attention... but this Spark was... different. It belonged to a newly married couple. And by tradition, this Spark was totally bathed in flowers.
Now, don't get me wrong. It wasn't the first time that I've seen this. I've seen flowers cello-taped on cars before. But here it seemed that the couple, in their excitement of getting married, spent their entire honeymoon money on buying flowers and taping them to the car. In fact, I'm surprised how I even figured out that it was a Chevy Spark.
If you're thinking 'Oh Abhishek! C'mon! It doesn't take that many flowers to cover a tiny Spark anyways', then I wish you a lifetime of unhappiness and tragedy...because you've totally missed the point.
Why would anybody want to do that to their car? Isn't it enough to have just a few corsages stuck to your car to get the point across?
The following are the only reasons why I think the car was assaulted with those flowers -
1. Somebody married the car.
2. The car got married to another car in a Stone-Age themed marriage where everybody was dressed in flowers and leaves (including the bride and groom)
3. The car had the fevicol logo on it and then, it drove through that farm from DDLJ (that huge sun-flower farm where SRK and Kajol hug).
4. The car hyper pollinated itself. (Anybody who corrects me on this will have some pollen grains shoved up their arse)
In fact, this led me to question the very basics of this tradition. Why would you put flowers on your car when you get married? What can possibly be the reason?
1. So that people, in general, will know you're married.
Why would you want random people on the street to know that you just got married? You think they're going to step aside for you and let you pass? You think other cars on the road will be extra nice to you and make way for you? You think somebody will hang their head out like a dog and congratulate you? As your car passes by the road, you think people will throw gifts into your car?
2. So that your car knows that you're now married and there will be some major ass-pounding happening in the backseat.
Okay, I can't argue with that one.
3. To make the car stand out and make the happy couple feel special.
Hey, you know what else could make the car stand out? You could ask a juggler to stand on top of the car and juggle dried up turd, while you drive around town. Surely it would also make your happy couple feel special. After all, nobody else has a turd juggler on top of their car now, do they?
In conclusion, when you get married, leave your car out of it. Suicide is not something you drag your friends into.
lol this one is so true..!
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
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